The Blarney Stone!

Monday, 17th March 2008 The Blarney stone!

I know its St. Patrick’s day, and no, I haven’t kissed the blarney stone, so what I am telling is exactly what happened.

Yesterday, I did everything I usually do on my Sundays, I got up, had my tea and yogurt (I have realised that I have not spoken about my diet so far, I shall do that at some point) and went off to church with my guitar! Ok, so I took the car, but it was raining and I didn’t want to get my guitar bag all wet and stuff, besides, I will do some training when I get back from church.

Suitably refreshed, spiritually and physically, (I had another cup of tea after the morning service) I was all set to think about doing some dancing and prancing around in my kitchen to my itunes, when I received a phone call from my second cousin once removed and replaced three times, or whatever the relationship is there, that she and the other half are in the area and ‘is it ok to pop in for tea!’ ‘Yes, no problem’ I say looking around at the untidy house! ‘See you both soon’ So now I am running around like a blue assed fly tidying up, and empting the dishwasher to re fill with last nights bits! Well they came, and I looked calm and unflustered even though they were on my doorstep within fifteen minutes after calling!, and the house? , well the down stairs looked pretty good, even if I do say so myself. Not too pristine clean that it makes you feel uncomfortable and not to untidy to make you think, ‘that lazy bloomin’ mare’
Anyway, the relatives stayed for a least three or so hours, so no bumping and grinding to any sort of music while I do housework. But there was this feeling inside of me of guilt. Yes, that’s right, guilt. I felt guilty that I hadn’t done any sort of exercise all day, maybe I should get up an hour earlier, before church, and do my run then. Ah there it goes, the guilty feeling disappeared! With that only one thought, me getting up early! The whole guilt thing left me. And so, as I was saying good by to the outlaws on the doorstep, the old boy came home from work! ‘Well no chance of a run now’ I won’t even mention the bump and grind bit, you know how men think. I thought to my self. ‘Gotta get the ole boy his dinner’ So that was Sunday, a nice day, a no heart racing, head throbbing, music pounding legs aching, sweat inducing Sunday, Just the way it should be.

Monday how ever is a different day. I had already pre-planned to take young girl to school on our bikes this morning, as I haven’t got the little fella to take to the nursery. I set off after doing my warm ups in the kitchen and I felt ok. Well look at me, I am cycling to school, and I’m not hurting as much as I usually do, then again I haven’t gone up the hills yet. I pick up the young girl, she gives me a very peculiar look because of my cycle helmet, (And with my track record for falling off bikes, it is probably a wise thing to wear) we set off for the one mile journey to her school. We are not going a breakneck speed and I am really just gently cycling along when I take a quick glance at young girl, she is puffing and panting!! What is this, I think to myself, a young fit healthy girl, who only last year, probably would have beaten me to the end of the path, is struggling slightly. Or maybe its because she has smaller wheels and has to peddle more than me, if you’re into maths, or science, or what ever it is that you need do to calculate the amount of times one has to peddle a smaller wheel bike compared to a larger wheel bike, then again I expect that is what you will be thinking right about now. But not me, I am feeling quite proud of my self as I stop and walk with young girl. ’You ok’ I ask, and then offer to take her school bag of her shoulders, because she says its slowing her down! Hmmm I wonder if that is the reason, but I doubt it, I think to myself smugly. When we get to the point were it’s a huge hill to climb, I am all prepared to keep up with this young girl on her small wheel bike and ride along right beside her. I start up the hill and I am thinking to myself ’I am not going to make it,’ I am going to have to ask young girl to get off her bike so that we can push our push bikes up the hill. How disappointed I feel right now, until that is, young girl says to me, ’I can’t ride up hills, I am going to have to get off and push’ Oh joy of joys, I think, ’Yeah, that’s no problem’ I say to young girl, all the while, secretly thanking Him upstairs.

It was an uneventful ride to the school and I got back home fairly quickly. Well that’s the exercise done for today, now time to finish housework, (because it didn’t get finished yesterday with the outlaws here) and then maybe get the Fender out. No, no, no, no, no! That is not possible, not when you have a nagging, fit, active, nagging (did I already say that) sister telling you to ‘Do the mile’ Nag, nag, nag! ‘I need to take my car to the garage then I’m jogging all the way home’ Says nagging sister. Well that can’t be far, I’m thinking to myself. ‘So how far is the garage’ I asked trying not to sound too interested. ‘I don’t know’ she says. Then I suggested to put the mile-ometer thingy on the car when she takes it to the garage. I say goodbye to nagging sister and go and get my training clothes on, by now they are looking worn, I even have a tear in the legs so I look like a complete professional, who does loads of training and wears out jogging bottoms! I do my warm ups and then straight out to do that stretch of path! Again uneventful journey to turn around lamppost. Check time, and it was 7:27:93 So, it was faster than last time, well I presumed it was, but I can’t really say as I couldn’t see properly last time. ‘You on time’ I heard a voice from the side of me. I look over to my right and there was a passer by ‘you on time’ she says again after I remove my ipod from my ears. ‘Yes, I’m a little bit quicker as well I think’ I said back to her, then I remembered to just push the button to record the time I stopped then I can restart it again after my little chat. I explained to the friendly passer by about why am looking like I have just come out of the Lambert and Butler factory after I have smoked the whole days quota of cigarettes. ‘Good luck’ She says after me, as I go back down the path, with me feeling as if I have just stolen a few precious moments off of nagging sister to recuperate. On wards down the path, always hurdling over messy dog owners dogs doings,(I am blaming the dog owners now, because they could at least teach their dog to poop in the verges at the very least). I reach the end of the path all set to get to my house on the road. ‘What do you look like’ I hear a voice call from a car. My friend was looking at me and chuckling at my puffy, crimson red throbbing wet face. ‘What’s all this in aid of ? she says. Again I push the button to stop the timer, anything for a few precious seconds, and explain to her the reason I am looking a complete mess. ‘Good for you’ She says, ‘Keep it up’ And with that I am off again, trying to jog the whole way back now to my house. All the time knowing sister is going to be jogging back from the garage, I feel sure that it is a mile, I am just hoping its not. Grind teeth!!!!! I look at my stopwatch and to my horror I have used up all the spaces to record split times and now I have stopped the timing altogether. But this time I feel sure that I have beaten my previous as I thunder on towards my house, angry at myself for doing that again with the stopwatch, I must invest in a proper stopwatch.

Back at the house, I quickly unlock the door and make straight for the tap. Gulp down a glass of water and collapse on the sofa, sticking slightly to the leather. Thank goodness I went with the leather can you imagine the state of it in a few months time, yuck! There I sat, I should get up and do the warm downs. But I sat, and I sat. ‘Now!’ I heard sisters nagging voice inside my head ‘Get up now and stretch out the muscles!’ I know I should, and reluctantly I surrender to the voice and get up and stretch out my muscles before making myself a nice cuppa.

Sister rings me ‘it’s a mile from the garage to mine’ she says ‘And I jogged all the way home, no stopping , no walking, just jogging’ Oh how I hate……………….talking!!!!